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It's the WarCraft drinking game! On the "Mists of Pandaria"...


This article contains strong criticism against the new WoW expansion: Mists of Pandaria. If you wish to read the happy-go-lucky version of this news story go to any major, corporate gaming-related website.

It's the World of Warcraft drinking game - drink every time you see a gamer who's psyched about the great, new WoW expansion that will change the game forever, forgetting what the last "great, new WarCraft experience" brought with it (here's a hint: nothing; they charged $60+$15/month for a new set of mobs and that's it).

Ouch, that was an awkward statement! Then again, I find it awkward to write about the "great expansion" of WoW every other year. Pardon me if I'm biased (and I am, of that you can be certain), but isn't World of Warcraft the MMO equivalent of Call of Duty? Yes. Yes, it is. People re-buy different versions of the same sodding game every year.


WoW Expansions Would be Great as DLCs, But no...

These aren't sequels, they never were - both CoD and WoW simply polish up the graphics, add new skins, throw in some content and charge you sixty bucks for the "new game". Could these so-called "sequels" be made into DLC (downloadable content)? Yes, they could and they'd probably be great DLCs. The problem is that they are marketed as full-fledged games and that kinda sucks.

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 Mists of Pandaria: Preview Trailer angers dumb Chinese nationalists.

The first thing that Blizzard announced was that the aim of the expansion was to bring players back to WoW (if you didn't know, World of Warcraft has suffered a large population drop since "Cataclysm," which we covered in Is WoW Dead?.

To me, their statement is like a silent confession: "We know that gamers are sick of the same old concept so we're going to throw a yearly expansion at them in hopes to milk the WoW cow for a little longer".

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 Mists of Pandaria: Dungeon Preview. This is the Temple of the Jade Serpent.


The WoW New Expansion That Will (Not) Change The Game Forever

The main promises this time for the new WoW expansion are:

  1. A) A new race called the "Pandarens" (which feels like a huge rip-off since we are used to having 2 new races in an expansion). The "cool twist" this time is that Pandarens will remain neutral until level 10 (yes, this was promoted as a full-blown twist). Big deal...

  2. B) A new class called the "Monk". I must admit that this is the most interesting part of the expansion, because races are essentially just skins for your avatar, nothing more. The Monk class will be the second class to be added to WoW after the infamous "Death Knight", which was the big draw of the "Wrath" expansion.

    This new class is available to all races with the exception of Goblins and Worgen (the big draw of "Cataclysm"). Monks also appear to lack the ability of auto-attacking spells (the only innovative thing of the whole sodding expansion).

  3. C) A new Asian-themed zone to explore: "Pandaria". Yes, a new zone, just like the last four times.

  4. D) No more flying mounts until max. level. What?! How is this a new feature? You're taking things away, not adding them.

This is it! This is the basic, simplified list of what Blizzard is going to charge you 60$ for.


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 Mists of Pandaria: Dungeon Preview. Behold, this is the Shado-pan Monastery!

Latest Update
In a recent video, TotalHalibut, a popular (over 500,000 YouTube subscribers) gaming commentator/reviewer, said that, although "Cataclysm" beta videos brought him more views than those of any other game, he will not cover WoW's new expansion "Mists of Pandaria" and will instead focus on "games that actually bring something to the table, games along the lines of Guild Wars 2 and SWTOR...."

An unexpected move from someone who hosted a popular WoW podcast for over 4 years, don't you think? Did you enjoy this article? Please take a moment to share the latest WoW new expansion with your friends. Feel free to also follow me on Twitter.



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